Posted by Jonathan on
February 1, 2010
How Hard Can It Be? 1966 Triumph 2000
If you look up Triumph on Wikipedia, the first sentence you will read is this: “The Triumph Motor Company is a defunct British motor manufacturer.” Sad. Established in 1885, Triumph graduated from selling bicycles to creating nimble little sports car and moderately competent sports sedans. However, by the bitter end in 1984, Triumph was reduced to selling the cheese-wedge TR7 (actually cancelled in 1981) and a rebadged Honda Civic known as the Acclaim. The company name is now owned by BMW, and Triumph has became just another punchline for the British car industry.
Speaking of pulling punches, welcome back to a long-overdue How Hard Can It Be? Read the rest of this entry »
Posted by Jonathan on
January 3, 2010
How Hard Can It Be? Bitter SC and Ferrari 400i
This isn’t the normal How Hard Can It Be? It doesn’t talk about a basketcase nightmare of a car that we, with a delusional infusion of cash and imagination, would restore to its alleged former glory. This episode won’t cover some rusty incomplete heap that could only again be a living car through the grace of whatever god to which you happen to pray. In this case the “What if?” is only as far away as your favorite online classified, or maybe your bank manager.
The conversation began with an online friend posting a link on a vintage BMW email list. There was a Bitter SC Coupe being auctioned on Ebay. Bitters were an interesting piece of 80s kit. The brainchild of Erich Bitter married Opel Senator mechanicals with a luxurious interior, a la Maserati Quattroporte, and Italian-built sheetmetal which stole its visual cues from the Ferrari 365 GTC/4 and 400i.
Bitter SCs were available in coupe, cabriolet, and über-rare four-door sedan configurations. During the heyday of gray-market importation, more than a handful of Bitters made their way to North America. All of them were powered by the larger 3.9-litre inline-six connected to either a GM three-speed autotragic or a Getrag five-speed manual. Performance was about par for the day: Manny-trannies would hit 100 km/h in 7.6 seconds and run into a wall of air at 230 km/h. Autoboxes were slower, most noticeably in the 0-100 km/h race.
Posted by Jonathan on
December 9, 2009
How Hard Can It Be? 1985 Honda Prelude
Nostalgia is a funny thing. I’ve said it before and I say it now. The rose-tinted memories of high school love turn into a really uncomfortable lunch date with someone you have nothing in common with ten years on. Chef Boyardee and White Castle are never as tasty as they were during a fierce bout with the drunk munchies in college. Of course, cars are the same way: your 1976 Buick Century with the K-Mart-sourced Sanyo cassette deck and speaker combo pack would today leave you weeping, and not in a good way.
So it was with a particular 1985 Honda Prelude, conveniently the topic of this episode of How Hard Can It Be?
Reed and I were the German car kings. I had my Rabbit and he had his Quantum wagon (Passat to everyone else in the world). My parents had an Audi and his parents had a Mercedes-Benz. We worshipped at the altar of BMW and Porsche. We would fawn over idiot-bastard coachbuilt cars like the Bitter SC and anything kissed by the aftermarket talents of Ruf and Koenig. Japanese cars were something that happened to other people.
Posted by Jonathan on
November 21, 2009
How Hard Can It Be? 1977 Porsche 924
Some marriages appear to be made in heaven but wind up in the inevitable hell. Witness Winona Ryder and Johnny Depp, two intelligent and impossibly attractive people who still couldn’t make it work. Other marriages you can see as doomed right from the start. Witness any attempts at mating globally gigantic Volkswagen and the perfectly petite Porsche, up to and including the recent takeover swordplay between the two.
Hell always brings us back to How Hard Can It Be? Read the rest of this entry »
Posted by Jonathan on
November 8, 2009
How Hard Can It Be? Chevrolet Corvair Wagon
Let’s begin by not mentioning Ralph Nader. Let’s not mention him because well before he was fiddling about in US elections, resulting in mentally deficient leadership, he was mucking up the automobile industry. And that twat Joan Claybrook. Let’s not speak of her, either.
Let instead talk about when General Motors wasn’t afraid to try new things. You had the Pontiac Tempest that featured a rear-mounted transaxle, contributing to near 50/50 weight distribution, and four-wheel independent suspension, which actually made it sort of handle. You have the Oldsmobile F-85 with its turbocharged, aluminum 215 CID V8. And of course, you have the Chevrolet Corvair, the General’s first production foray into engines in the rear and swing in the axles.
Welcome back to How Hard Can It Be?, where we always swing, usually toward the rear. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted by Jonathan on
October 30, 2009
How Hard Can It Be? Ferrari Daytona Spyder Replica
For many years there have been wonderful recreations of exceptional Ferraris. We’re not talking about the Mera, an ill-proportioned Ferrari 308 built upon a Pontiac Fiero. Nor are we talking about the Puma, something that bore absolutely no resemblance to a Ferrari 246 Dino. No, we’re talking the upper echelon.
While not the absolute cream of the Cavallino Rampante crop, the McBurnie Spyder recreated the feel of a 365 GTS/4 Daytona in style, if not absolute substance. Nobody will ever forget the first episode of “Miami Vice” featuring Crockett and Tubbs rolling through deepest darkest Miami serenaded by Phil Collins’ “In The Air Tonight.”
Just the thought gives me chills and makes me want a snootful of blow. And speaking of, welcome to How Hard Can It Be? Read the rest of this entry »
Posted by Stirling on
October 24, 2009
How Hard Can It Be?: Double Shot of Maserati Biturbo
On the surface, the idea of buying a Maserati for $4000 sounds quite nice. The idea of someone being willing to sell you two Maseratis for the same price sounds wonderful… that is, until you remember the existence of the brilliantly named Biturbo. That is what is being offered on Craig’s List, the place where cars go to scream one last cry for help. More details after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted by Jonathan on
October 17, 2009
How Hard Can It Be? 1964 Ford Falcon Wagon
The Beach Boys epitomized the California lifestyle in the 1960s. Songs like Surfin’ Safari, 409, and California Girls painted hallucinatory pictures of how carefree life could be on the beach. The easy ways of cool cars, hot girls, and killer waves on which to surf were immortalized in the harmonies and lyrics of Brian Wilson and his bandmates.
Every day, we wish they could all be California… cars. But they’re not. Because if they were they wouldn’t need the rusty floors replaced. Welcome to How Hard Can It Be?
Posted by Jonathan on
August 1, 2009
How Hard Can It Be? 1950ish Opel Olympia
Small station wagons have always been popular in Europe. They offered the efficiency and affordability of their sedan stablemates with a little more room for groceries, lumber, or the hounds. Known as estates, shooting brakes, and tourings, the station wagon’s popularity jumped across the pond but somehow was diminished by the rise of the sport-utility vehicle, itself merely a station wagon with big tyres.
I grew up in small station wagons like the Datsun 510 and 610, as well as a smallish late-70s Chevy Malibu. The geek gene is strong and the temptation for a silly wagon occasionally has to be beaten back with a stick. Or a stiff Scotch. Since my wife is similarly afflicted, I have the feeling there will be another square five-door in my life at some time. Hello 1961 Pontiac Catalina or 1963 Chevy Impala?
It may or may not be a late-1950s Opel Olympia Caravan. Welcome back to How Hard Can It Be?, the game show where we viciously pit dollars and time against your sanity. Read the rest of this entry »
Posted by Jonathan on
July 16, 2009
How Hard Can It Be? 1988 Alfa Romeo Milano
Alfa Romeo has a heritage any car company would be proud of. The pre-war 6C and 8C monsters, piloted by the old masters such as Nuvolari and Caracciola, dominated sports car racing. Even Enzo Ferrari had his shield on an 8C-35 for a time. Later, the smaller Alfas, the 105/115 Series did showroom and race track battle with other small boxes like the Datsun 510 and the BMW 2002.
In the heady 1970’s, Alfa Romeo began using a transaxle, which is a fancy way of saying the transmission is at the rear. The first application was the Alfetta line of cars which later became the GTV6. Then came the 75, known as the Milano in North America.
Which brings us to your daily dose of ambition-crusted suck pile, also known as How Hard Can It Be?
