In 7 short days, the 2013 Formula 1 season begins in Melbourne with the Australian Grand Prix!
Last year, your author watched more than half the races, many of them live at completely obscene hours of the morning. So if you’re looking for a devoted perspective, you’ve come to the right place. It’s easier for our European friends to watch F1 races live, but the TV schedule is rather more challenging for us igloo-dwellers 8 time zones away!
While we followed F1 more closely than ever before in 2012, most of our thoughts on the matter were published on Twitter. Only Jenson Button’s cries for a RHENOCÉROUS were loud enough to prompt an article on these pages. Interestingly, that article was more prescient than most, as Button’s boys at McLaren have followed Ferrari’s pull-rod (i.e. “rhino-faced”) front suspension design for the 2013 season, the only other team to do so. We already knew Jenson was quite the hobbyist, running marathons in sub-3hrs, but who knew he was such a lobbyist too!
The 2009 World Champion, the off-season triathlete who is now only a Schumacher re-retirement away from taking an Old Fogeys of F1 podium, is confusingly envious. The loathsome nose exhibited on every other 2012 F1 car, other than Jenson’s majestic McLaren MP4-27 reminds me of the scene in Midnight in Paris when Salvador Dali, played by the notable nose of Adrian Brody, goes on at length about the RHENOCÉROS(!), a creature known for its bi-horned beak (I’ve included the scene below for the unfamiliar). Come to think of it, if you crossed Brody with a rhino, a 2012 F1 car wouldn’t be far off. Except the very pretty McLaren. Yet the monstrous muzzle is the apple of Button’s eye! How can this be?!
After Peter Orosz’s compelling thesis in favour of McLaren’s beautiful sniffer swept me off my feet, Button’s clear uncertainty regarding his team’s 2012 design direction, despite his admitted preference for the new seating position, doesn’t instill confidence.
C’mon man! You’ve got two weeks to grow a pair! As Tina Fey famously said, “Confidence in 10% hard work and 90% delusion”. And it sounds like Jenson might be too experienced (read: old) to delude himself any longer.
Coming up from June 10-12 at the Gilles Villeneuve Circuit in Montreal, Formula 1 is once again gracing our frozen and barren wonderland. At least they’re going to Montreal, perhaps our country’s crowning jewel, if not just the most European feeling.
This trailer appeals to the francophones among us. Those who didn’t pay attention to Monsieur LeBlanc’s junior high French class are missing out on hyperbolic boasting of driving gods, mythical circuits, and the pinnacle of motorsport. All the usual stuff, then.
Hopefully you can find somewhere more inspiring that a T.G.I.Friday’s to watch the race.
Motor racing is one of the most technologically advanced, visually arresting, exciting sporting spectacles in the world. Highly competitive race series around the globe are a potent sensory assault combining the heady smell of hot tarmac and petrol, the sleek, intricately designed, vividly liveried vehicles, and perhaps most importantly, that piercing, high-pitched whine of high-revving engines.
For many, the noise of motorsport is the primary appeal. I’ll always remember going to my first Formula One Grand Prix, the cars could be heard several seconds before they barreled past in a cacophony of millions of explosions occurring simultaneously inside the 3 litre engine. As they passed by and changed gear I could feel it in my chest, consolidating the emotional, passionate connection I felt with the sport, the cars, and the gloriously deafening noise.
The Spanish Grand Prix stumbles onto the Formula 1 calendar this Sunday at the Catalunya Circuit, just 30 short minutes northeast of breezy Barcelona. For no reason in particular other than that we had the opportunity, CarEnvy is flying to Spain to experience Formula 1 properly. This will be our first time in a country that hosts an F1 race WHILE the race is actually happening AND in a country that actually cares about the sport AND as that country cheers on its Ferrari-driving hometown hero. To add even more to this story, Fernando Alonso has just extended his contract with the Prancing Italians until 2016. Even the stories have stories.
CarEnvy won’t actually be attending the race, in part because there are others who will provide more in-depth and knowledgeable coverage than we ever could, and in part because we’ll be in Madrid, Bilbao, and some city that likes its compost (Something de Compostela?), not Barcelona.
But what the others won’t show you is the feeling of a country as it climbs up and down Freytag’s pyramid – with the rising action, climax, and falling action – from the Cirque du Soleil-shaming circus of an F1 race.
It will be entirely unlike experiencing an F1 race here in Canada, or anywhere in North America, for that matter.
We will also be highlighting the distinctive and rare automobilia that we come across in España. Check back frequently for updates from the country that gave us El ingenioso hidalgo Don Quixote de la Mancha, regarded by people who can read Spanish as one of the finest pieces of literature of all time.
Hey, it wouldn’t be called carENVY if you weren’t occasionally envious if us. Wish us well.
Yes, this clip is in Arabic or some other equally incomprehensible language, but you’ll get the gist of the race. Vettel had a bad start, Jensen went into the wrong pit on his first stop, Vettel used a 2-stop strategy, Hamilton used a 3-stopper, and Mark Webber came from 18th to end up on the podium.